you get to find out what you left out and get a very good idea of why you are in such bad shape financially!....
I mean, it's good, it's an eyeopener, but...this year I had my "plan" spreadsheet to control my debt and my "expenses" spreadsheet to track variable expenses....next year I'll have a "budget" file where these two come together....and adding the fixed expenses as well....OUCH!...2007 is starting to look scary!!!

just to bring my debt to the same level it was last year! ugh!...doable, but not easy...I can count on $600 from my Xmas bonus (which should be around $763 this year, but from there I pay Nanny's Xmas bonus and my share of Xmas dinner!)... I don't think there'll be more than $800 for the toys, so my only hopes are: 1) get cousin to pay for the full phone bill, 2) try to collect as much as possible from the money owed me for services and 3) find some translations!!!...

I DO know that the school supplies should bring in about $1,000 but, that will be in January....and, I have other uses for that (Ale's school enrollment fee, uniforms and books for Fall 2007 + Ale's bed!)...

translations, anyone??

I was looking at my debt level and, realized that it's $2,400 higher than at the beginning of January...(it's the car and the infamous phone bill!)

....if I took my level of debt in Jan (11K) and added the car ($3.6K) and the infamous phone bill (1K)....= 15.6K....substract my current level of debt: 13.4K (includes car and phone bill!)....that means I have paid off about $2,200 ....since my $20 challenge has been $3,200....that means I have either paid off $1,000 in interest or, I have paid part of $1,000 in interest and have spent the rest!! -- don't know which one is worst!...

((sigh)) I guess what this means is that I will most probably NOT comply with my goal of starting Jan 07 with only $7K in debt...but, at this point I'd settle for bringing it back to the $11K with which I started Jan 06! -- wish me luck!

I couldn't sleep last night...I don't know if it's because I haven't been feeling well (getting over a cold), because I feel like my bills are catching up with me again (money is tied up with the toys until we deliver the orders, sometime between the 27th/Nov and the 5th/Dec)...or, because I still haven't got the materials to go print and the training starts on Saturday, so the boxes have to be ready on Friday!....might even be a bad combination of all!

...cousin calls today and says 2 more orders for toys have come in...she then proceeds to tell me her friend who had asked if we could include her in the venture, and that she could lend us up to $5K, provided she got a percentage of the earnings and did not have to get involved other than with the money side of it, has suddenly backed out and said that she lent her money to someone else...cousin then says: what can we do?... do you know anybody who might be willing to lend us $2K?...(she knows the answer is "no" -- outside of the people in my office, we all know the same people!-- ) ...I know where this is headed, so I play dumb...eh, no. Noone comes to mind...so, since I'm not saying it, she suggests it, finally: "and, you don't think any of the managers would...you know"...No, I don't know them that well - I say. ...In reality, I know a couple of them well enough to ask, but, it's MY NAME on the line, they would be lending that money TO ME, not TO US...and, bear in mind, that money would have to be at HER house so that she could go buy the toys...remember what happened last time??....now, what is there to assure me that it won't happen again??...that D. gave his word and that he has the judges orders that say he can't drink, or go out after 9pm and that he has to go to rehab and family therapy??...((ALARM BELLS)) don't think so!!!...now, admitted, I AM investing some of my own money into this, but, worst case scenario, I'll end up in more debt than before ((knock on wood))...but, if I ask these guys to invest THEIR money, my reputation is at stake, too!... no, I cannot risk that and, NO, I'm not going to ask! ...I'd rather we lose the business that could be generated by those 2 orders!!...Besides, as I told her: this wouldn't be necessary if she had fixed her problem with Bank S. (she had a cc, and she had arranged for her last employer to deduct the payments for the cc directly from her salary...as per Bank S, she owes them 2 payments....and the accrued interest for the past 5 years!...as per cousin, those 2 payments came out of her severance and, if the employer didn't pay it, it's not her responsibility -- HELLO??!! -- I've been telling her for years to get that fixed!)...if she had, she would be eligible for a "seasonal loan" for micro-business...but, it's "too much hassle"...
and "she doesn't have the time"...uh-uh, as I said before: not gonna happen!!
(I know she's probably thinking that I'm silly -- or a much harsher word!-- for not taking this opportunity, but, I'm not budging!)

we each received a diploma and a letter with comments/critics to our business plan..
mine reads:

*Emphasize tourism companies in target market section
*Review proyections, growth is overestimated,rework financial analysis
*Salaries are not according to the reality of an emerging company (so...they think I can hire good translators at $300/month, or what?...the first year, the only salary contemplated is MY salary, and of course it is based on me making enough to cover all my living expenses....)
*Review sales forecast (ok, I agree with this!...this has always been my greatest problem: getting customers...marketing plan was supposed to take care of this!)
*Consider cultural change in target market
*Be realistic regarding profit margins (sorry, the costs of translating are NOT high!...most of the investment was my education, how much does it really cost me to translate a 20-page document? ...next to nothing!...unless I pay myself a high salary!...so, even with the "unreal" salaries, they think the profit margins are too high!)

...I think what saddens me the most is that it must have cost me about $200 to participate in the competition thing...at least I consider that money as an investment and not a waste!...I did learn a lot! (mostly about myself!) and, as I said before, I still believe I have a GREAT business idea...and, you'll see, I WILL start this company, even if it takes me a year just to get enough money to get it started!

we must come across as such a horrible family!...and we aren't, honestly!...

Nephew D - cousin's son, he of the phone calls!- is causing trouble again (not that he ever stopped, I guess it was just that he hadn't had the opportunity!)...

cousin got paid the 50% advance from two toy purchase orders, amounting to $2,100...for some strange reason (I really have no idea...I may ask later, but not right now -- you'll see why!)...well, for some strange reason she cashed the check and kept the $$$ at home! ...now, for some even stranger reason, she decided to tell D where she was leaving the money, in case anything happened to her -- maybe she hasn't been feeling well, I don't know, she's overweight and diabetic and, she doesn't exactly take care of herself! --now...I know EVERYONE here knows where this is headed, right?

RIGHT! He stole $300 and spent the whole afternoon binge-drinking with "friends"...he came back dead drunk and with $21 in his pockets...

I'm unlucky enough to have been there 1) when she discovered the theft -- which was obvious, as we HAD to take out the money so she could give me the money for the expenses that I had incurred!...I must say, when she mentioned she had told him, the first thought that crossed my mind was: WHY did you do that??...had to bite my toungue...and 2) when he arrived home!...oh, that was a scene from a bad soap opera!...really...I mean,at some point he said: search me, I don't have $300!...she got so mad she slapped him and he fell on the floor (he could barely stand anyway!) and he just went to sleep and started snoring!...it was just awful!...she had called a friend of hers to come help and, I waited there until he arrived...then I excused myself and left!...
I called her this morning, after coming from the Transport Protectin Division of the police (still trying to get the documents needed for that missing license plate for the company car! -- but that's another story!)...she told me she had called the police and they had come to get him...he was still sleeping when they got him out of the house...he is a minor and they had the mother's permission)...Apparently, he woke up sometime around 2am and tried to call his Uncle T. (cousin's best friend)...he couldn't take the call, he was out of the house, they know from a message in their machine!...

So, anyway, cousin is out $300 MORE ... which would be bad enough already if someone else had done it...but, being her son...Plus, obiously, now she has to 1) face the fact that the boy IS an alcoholic and 2) as a mother, living with putting your son in jail, whether merited or not, must be really difficult....

Took my car for an oil change today...spent $22.84...they also quoted on some other stuff that needs to be done: brake check, 2 new tires and change of coolant in the radiator...for a total of $108....
...so...I'll start quoting and shopping around! ((sigh))

We went to the mall yesterday (needed to repair DD's schoolbag, but the store that does it was closed!)...we passed in front of store #2, they had the exact same bed that store #1 sells at $199.20....only at #2 it was priced at $219...the payment plan?? (also on the card displayed on top of the bed, we didnt go in!)...24 easy payments of $16/ 52.00% interest + VAT...(so, I could get the exact bed for $315!!!)...honestly, I had to laugh!...

Plus, at this moment I really don't know if it makes any sense to keep looking...there's a (slight) chance that we may be moving out of the country in 3-6 months...true, Ale is almost at the limit and her tiny toddler bed will soon be uncomfy, but...I'm honestly thinking of waiting until March (this is when we would know more about that potential opportunity!)...

I decided to buy a simpler bed for Ale, and settled on a Capri Jr, which has a cute headboard...I went to a store that has a special promotion: buy now pay your first installement in December (yes, they are after our Xmas bonuses!)...the bed costs $199 (I should have marched right out, I've seen this exact bed at $165 elsewhere!)...still I asked the saleslady to quote a "6-month,no interest" plan...the don't have it...so, the "normal" plan is $25 downpayment and 12 monthly payments of $19.90 ...that's almost $65 in interest they are collecting! ...they're crazy (or else, they think I am!...
I'll keep searching, thank you!

I decided that next year I'm going to keep my current debt tracker (which calculates monthly interest and pending balances, along with how long it will take to clear them!), but that I will incorporate the monthly payments into my expense tracker...I also decided to add the "fixed" expenses under the category "House" (rent, utilities, nanny...although nanny should go with school and that should merge into Child care....but, since she also does housework...)...anyway, I did that and, I calculated what my monthly expenses from these 2 categories are...I added the monthly totals to the categories already being tracked and, it turns out, to cover all I would need $1,237.XX NET per month! LOL!...I'm making $1,062 GROSS...no wonder I'm always scraping for money! (and, no wonder a few weeks off the frugal wagon can have such a nasty impact!)...so, all in all, I'm not doing THAT bad (I mean, eventhough my fixed income is about $372 BELOW my expenses, I more or less manage to get along and survive! --and have the occasional treat now and then! )

I have to think of a way to lower the spending some more in some of the categories... but, honestly, it would be VERY hard to carve $372!(35%)...unless we all decide to go on a 3-day fast once a month! LOL!...

I have $66 in my bank account right now...$40 will go to nanny today....that leaves me the amazing amount of $26 until next payday, which is October 31st! ....I'm getting REALLY stressed out!...

Ok, time to start calling about money owed to me again! ((sigh))

This time, it DID go to Ale's school...together with $47 more I had in my account...

Next crisis, please!

Oh, yeah, I have to pay $165 towards debt and $157.50 for late rent...plus the $157.50 of this month's rent...

The money for toys should start coming in by the end of next week...

In the meantime...I'm off to juggle numbers and see what I can do with what I've got!

and sis has disowned him...that means he is cut off from the family altogether...

we just couldn't go on anymore...7 years is enough!

My cousin arranged the purchase of 4 boxes of Kimberly paper for printing our Business Plans for the contest (she gets them at $1.50 each, 100 page box....local price is between $1.90-$2.25 for a box of 25!)...well, the business plans are due Monday at noon, and, we had agreed to try to have them by Friday noon so we could hand them in either Friday afternoon or Monday at 8:00am...but, she still hasn't gone to pick it up!!!!...and it's THURSDAY...and it's almost noon!!...((sigh))...
my plan was to print the main body here at the office (b/w) and take only the color pages (about 6 per plan) to X*erox across the street to have those printed today and then have the whole thing bound...

She said she'd drop them off as soon as she gets them...we'll see...otherwise, I'll have to come up with a Plan B before end of day today! ugh!


**** woo-hoo! update!!! she has the paper and will drop it off after lunch!

August and September were really bad months, as far as overspending goes...the good news is, nothing went on my cc...the bad news is, this has caused a serious cash flow problem....especially since I was counting on getting some of the money that is owed to me, and, that is looking very unlikely at the moment... I'm already one month behind with my part of the rent, and, I have until tomorrow to pay Ale's school without having to pay a late-payment fee ($10)...that means that, at the very least, I have to find $130 for tomorrow and, $160 more before Sunday...now, Sunday is payday (we get paid every 15th and every 30th), but, that money is already allocated to: rent, debt, food, nanny...so, unless I find those $290, I will have to do some serious changes in the budget...I really have noone to blame except myself...I hate being in these situations, why do I do this to myself??...

...yesterday night, my niece came back from her father's and, was sooooo excited about her prom dress and shoes...when my sis went to put her to bed (yes, she's 17, but my niece still insists her mom tuck her in!)...anyway, my sis took the cellphone off the bed and put it on the dresser...this morning, it was gone!...the house is secure now, with the new locks, so the only likely suspects are: sis, niece, Ale, the dog, myself and nephew...
Soooo...sis kicked him out of the house...now she's crying at home, because she's afraid of what might become of him....I feel for her, but, as I told her: it's HIS choice, and there really isn't anything she can do to help him...he didn't even admit to it, said he's tired of people always pointing their fingers his way whenever things get lost around the house!...we'll see what happens!

Yesterday I was having a conversation with my nephew about how we all need to have some sort of productive activity...whether you HAVE to work or whether you have enough money to afford not to -- in our case, we don't have enough to afford not to, obviously! -- you must have a productive activity to feel good about yourself...

In our home, my sis and I work outside the home, she's in sales, I'm an admin...the girls study (my niece also is captain of the cheerleading squad at school, and is the equivalent of the class president -- her school doesn't do "class president"-- organizing all events that the class is required to do to help the school, organizing social events for the class, speaking to the principal and the school board on behalf of the class)...Ale has her swim lessons and would like to do other stuff, as well...
So, I asked him, what do You do? ...what is your contribution??...if you aren't working or studying, you should either be looking for a way to finish your studies (he only got as far as 9th grade) or looking for a job OR helping around the house (the fact that we have Nanny and she does the housework doesn't mean he couldn't help!, he could be fixing small things around the house, for example, or watering the plants!...but, SOMETHING!)...I'm really mad and disappointed in him right now, because his response was: I'm getting called for a job between the 4th and the 12th and, I was going to go to the Minstry of Education to see about the studies, but Mom said that S (a friend of the family) had offered to go with me and he hasn't said anything more about going....HELLO!!! WHO should be the one saying: I want to go tomorrow, can you come with me???....ugh!

sorry, just a rant... I needed to vent! (I did tell my sister, though!)

Ugh! September wasn’t much better than August!

the only categories where I was at or below budget were:

ENTERTAINMENT
CELLPHONE
OTHER
CAR

That leaves me overbudget in

GROCERIES
SCHOOL
CLOTHES
EVENTS
LUNCH


(no excuses, just plain stupidity!)

so, for September, the result is 4/9
The great news is that, OVERALL, I was on budget this time!!

Hoping to have better results for 061101!

((remember this covers variable expenses only))

ANOTHER $20 are missing from my purse...since we installed the lock and, since I had it yesterday night at 9:30pm when I undressed and, since I don't have it now at work, it HAS to be someone from home...there is only 1 likely suspect (despite his claiming it might have been the nanny...#1, Nanny has been with us for 7 years and NOT A CENT has ever been missing...she does put things away in places you'd never think logical, but, nothing has ever been missing...#2, yesterday, when I arrived, nanny was gone already and today, when I left, she hadn't arrived yet...so, that theory is total BS... worst thing is, I just called the house and I could hear him yelling at the nanny....THAT I will not have...I already phoned my sister...she's taking care of it right now ...I just hope nanny doesn't take the "maid way" and just decide to not show up anymore!)...so, so sad....

I've been feeling kind of "off" lately...like something isn't clicking, or something is missing...(kind of like when you didn't do your homework, or when you didn't study for a test, or the night before a big date...)...I don't know what is causing it...at first I thought it was just anxiety from the things that have been happening at home, and that changing the locks would make it go away (I feel much safer, though! so that's good)...but, that wasn't really it...right now I'm blaming it on my unfinished business plan (we have agreed to the changes to be made with my counselor and, he will come to my house on Saturday and we will work on it until it's finished...)...it might also be that I feel lonely...(recurrent feeling...it comes and goes...) ...or, it might be that I'm late with the rent (this hasn't happened in a long time, so "reliving" the bad days might be it...)
Anyway, I'm feeling weird...of course, the added stress from NOT knowing what it is is not helping!

unfortunately, it'll take $60 to pay for the new lock installed in our house (weird stuff has been going on!)

I got paid $100... I went out of the city this weekend and paid $10 for gas, and $2 for beverages at the gas station...upon my return we ordered a pizza and I paid $8.99....today I gave Ale her $2...but, I only got $57.01 in my purse...meaning $20 are "missing"!...My nephew hasn't had any access to my bag (nobody really has...except at the hotel where we stayed on Saturday, since we were at the pool all day!...)...hmmmm, will have to check my room tonight to see if the bill turns up....(it was all $20's originally, and, I DO have all the "change": 2 X $1, 1X $5 and 1X $10, so I'm missing a $20 bill!)...weird, weird...

the nanny washed Ale's white tennis shoes yesterday, and set them to dry on top of one of the beams in the laundry room...Needless to say, today I almost went crazy looking for the shoes (she is not allowed to come to school unless in "full" uniform, these are the only white tennis shoes she has...so, it was either find the shoes or stay home for her!)...I turned the house upside down and, in the process, saw A LOT of opportunity for decluttering - a bunch of size 11 and 12 shoes, for example, when Ale is already wearing shoes 2 sizes bigger than that!....so, this coming weekend (long weekend due Independence day!) Ale and I are going to try to declutter the house a bit!

(oh, and the shoes were still WET! I had to put them in the OVEN!!! -- we don't have a dryer...)

...I went shopping...My cousin called me to let me know about some sales: Brown Hush Puppies shoes for me at $10 (for work) and a pair of leather sandals also at $10..., and, 2 pajamas for Ale (she's outgrown all her pajamas!)and a pair of pink pants (she has a bunch of size 4 clothes that barely fit and a bunch of size 8-10 clothes that don't fit yet!)...total for all these was $45...and, today, I went into a dept store that is having a clearance to look for the bed for Ale....and, they didn't have the kind of bed I want, but, they had toys at 50% off (no, I didn't buy any toys, I just looked at them and called my cousin to see if we can use any of what they have for our Xmas toy business...)but, to do so I went through the children's clothing section...and found some Xclamation jeans at $3.99 and a nice skirt at $2.99....I also spotted a nice picture frame with "graduation" embossed in it (50% off $9.98), which would be perfect for my niece (she graduates high school in a couple of months)...
so, now I feel very guilty....but, looking at the bright side...it went on the debit card! (no interest and no fees!)...so...now I have to find a way to earn enough money to replace what I spent: ~$57 in total...

I hate it!...that 1.5 week out messed everything up!...I lost my habit of recording every expenditure (trying hard to get it back!) plus, I had so much backlogged work, I feel swamped!....AND, since I wasn't here to take care of payments, and the other admin hasn't processed any in so long, she processed them wrong, so we defaulted on ALL utility payments (which means you cannot pay at the bank, but have to go directly to the utility company) AND, that next moth I'll also have to go to the utility company because the invoices will include this month's amounts...so you have to go there to have a new invoice re-issued! (not to mention that I'll get chewed over the overdue fees!)......then there are the problems with the cars (the managers managed to lose 1 license plate - you cannot drive with just one here, you HAVE to have the 2!....and also to lose the car registration card for another car! ugh!)...one of our major trainings is coming up, too, and I'm in charge of logistics for that one...and we don't even have the final attendee list~

I guess I'm feeling overwhelmed!

I hate mosquitoes! ...Ale apparently got bitten again and now she has dengue fever...she's at home, resting, getting about 1,001 medicines and gallons of electrolytes...

ugh!...the event really messed up my record keeping...all I know is I'm waaaay oberbudget and I have this feeling that there are expenses missing (I have input what I could based on invoices and bills...but, I still feel like some things are missing...) --sigh!
I'm back on track as of today, but...

gas: 7.10 gallons @ $3.66

... and this is at one gas station that is consistently on the "lowest price" list published by the Center for Consumer Defense! OUCH!

Yesterday we passed one and, I happened to notice the prices: $3.66 at the self service pump! ((faints))