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uneasy

September 28th, 2006 at 08:56 am

I've been feeling kind of "off" lately...like something isn't clicking, or something is missing...(kind of like when you didn't do your homework, or when you didn't study for a test, or the night before a big date...)...I don't know what is causing it...at first I thought it was just anxiety from the things that have been happening at home, and that changing the locks would make it go away (I feel much safer, though! so that's good)...but, that wasn't really it...right now I'm blaming it on my unfinished business plan (we have agreed to the changes to be made with my counselor and, he will come to my house on Saturday and we will work on it until it's finished...)...it might also be that I feel lonely...(recurrent feeling...it comes and goes...) ...or, it might be that I'm late with the rent (this hasn't happened in a long time, so "reliving" the bad days might be it...)
Anyway, I'm feeling weird...of course, the added stress from NOT knowing what it is is not helping!

5 Responses to “uneasy”

  1. kashi Says:

    Hmm...that's definitely not a good feeling. I'm glad you changed the locks. Do you carry pepper spray or mace with you? Has your car been acting funny? Is everything ok with Ale? Have you been to the doctor lately? Have you met anyone recently that you felt funny about? It might be your intuition trying to tell you something. It might just be that stressful business plan, too. The fact that you felt the need to change the locks signals something else to me, though...

    Listen to you intuition, whatever craziness it might tell you! Here's hoping you feel more relaxed soon.

  2. miclason Says:

    well, not really...we changed the locks because somebody tried to take one of the side mirrors in my sister's car and, our lock didn't work, so we always had to leave the front door unlocked, and a couple of days ago one of our desk fans and a CD player that was in the dining room (both on the first floor) went missing....so, we thought someone that knows us and knows the house was unlocked and at what times we are out might have done it...scary thought!...so we installed a new lock, so the house is properly locked now!

  3. LuxLiving Says:

    I'm with kashi - listen to your gut!! Vary your path to and from home for a couple of weeks. Listen to the neck hair if it decides to rise!

    Take some quiet time to go thru the various scenarios you laid out. Pros/Cons of what is going on in each situation.

    Maybe the business plan is it. Maybe you do feel lonely. Maybe it isn't either of those, but that you feel a need for more personal physical safety?

    Think of what ifs - If it's the house - have I done all I can to secure it? What else should I be doing? If it's the business plan what parts are throwing up the warning signals? If it's past due bill anxiety, have I checked thru all of it to make sure everything has been paid?

    Keep trying to pinpoint exactly what's kicking up the dust!

  4. miclason Says:

    well, the business plan should be ready this weekend, so I'll know if that is it...
    The lonely feeling could be affecting me because for some strange reason whenever I feel like that I start thinking about calling Ale's dad...and that makes me VERY anxious and guilty....anxious because I'm afraid of rejection and, guilty because I've told myself 1,000,000 times if he were interested, he'd be the one making contact (email is free after all!)..so whenever I feel like calling him, I feel like in a way I'm letting myself down! Frown
    Of course, today we are also having a cocktail for the directors who are away at training, and, there's the stress of THAT! (did I do everything I was supposed to to ensure this is a success??!)...again, if this is it, I should be fine by tomorrow!

  5. LuckyRobin Says:

    I think it is pretty normal to have vague feelings of uneasiness after a break-in. It's a violation of your personal space and your home, the center of where you probably feel most safe in your life. I'd be unsettled by that alone. Also, by the fact that it might be someone you know, as opposed to stranger that broke in. You may not be sure who you can trust anymore. That would also leave me unsettled.

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