I've been feeling kind of "off" lately...like something isn't clicking, or something is missing...(kind of like when you didn't do your homework, or when you didn't study for a test, or the night before a big date...)...I don't know what is causing it...at first I thought it was just anxiety from the things that have been happening at home, and that changing the locks would make it go away (I feel much safer, though! so that's good)...but, that wasn't really it...right now I'm blaming it on my unfinished business plan (we have agreed to the changes to be made with my counselor and, he will come to my house on Saturday and we will work on it until it's finished...)...it might also be that I feel lonely...(recurrent feeling...it comes and goes...) ...or, it might be that I'm late with the rent (this hasn't happened in a long time, so "reliving" the bad days might be it...)
Anyway, I'm feeling weird...of course, the added stress from NOT knowing what it is is not helping!
uneasy
September 28th, 2006 at 04:56 pm
September 28th, 2006 at 06:03 pm 1159462984
Listen to you intuition, whatever craziness it might tell you! Here's hoping you feel more relaxed soon.
September 28th, 2006 at 06:28 pm 1159464527
September 28th, 2006 at 07:37 pm 1159468648
Take some quiet time to go thru the various scenarios you laid out. Pros/Cons of what is going on in each situation.
Maybe the business plan is it. Maybe you do feel lonely. Maybe it isn't either of those, but that you feel a need for more personal physical safety?
Think of what ifs - If it's the house - have I done all I can to secure it? What else should I be doing? If it's the business plan what parts are throwing up the warning signals? If it's past due bill anxiety, have I checked thru all of it to make sure everything has been paid?
Keep trying to pinpoint exactly what's kicking up the dust!
September 28th, 2006 at 08:30 pm 1159471842
The lonely feeling could be affecting me because for some strange reason whenever I feel like that I start thinking about calling Ale's dad...and that makes me VERY anxious and guilty....anxious because I'm afraid of rejection and, guilty because I've told myself 1,000,000 times if he were interested, he'd be the one making contact (email is free after all!)..so whenever I feel like calling him, I feel like in a way I'm letting myself down!
Of course, today we are also having a cocktail for the directors who are away at training, and, there's the stress of THAT! (did I do everything I was supposed to to ensure this is a success??!)...again, if this is it, I should be fine by tomorrow!
October 1st, 2006 at 07:01 am 1159682507